Saturday, May 22, 2010

Day 52: Drum - Heart-beat

Drum: 1a musical percussion instrument; usually consists of a hollow cylinder with a membrane stretched across each end 2.  to make a rhythmic sound. 

Heart-beat: 1. a pulse: the rhythmic contraction and expansion of the arteries with each beat of the heart; 2. blink of an eye: a very short time;  3. an animating or vital unifying force.


As I created this mandala, the thunder outside roared its low rumbling rainstorm-rhythm.  A perfect backdrop for this mandala.  This mandala clearly emerged from my anticipation and excitement I feel about the Introduction to Hand Drumming workshop that I am going to later this afternoon.  Again, the weather is a perfect mirror for this experience.   


I have always wanted to learn to play the drums -- specifically, the sort of drums, often african drums, that you play with your hands.  I know nothing about this except that, just like the experience and process of making mandalas calms me, so does the steady rhythm of the drum.  I have had the chance a few times to beat the african drum with others.  It is a powerful grounding force for me.  I love the very last definition offered above in Heartbeat --  an animating or vital unifying force.  For me, I believe that my life is about integrating all of the life experiences and various parts of myself, into one whole and authentic being, coming to a place of self-love and compassion.  I think, too, my life is about finding such unifying and connected experiences in the various communities in my life, the community of friends I have and the chosen family I have created with my partner and our animals. 


This journey is about honoring my authentic self, enough to share it with the world, instead of hiding with fear and self-doubt.  I will use all of these tools and processes- -- the beating of the drum, the process of re-membering of my sometimes broken heart, the true connection I have with my people, the belief and trust that there is a place for me in the circle of this life, and the experience of coming-home, again and again, to my breath, to the heart beat, to the calming force of the mandala -- as ways to meet and welcome my true self.

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